Collared's Agony Uncle Advice Surgery*View all problems :: Tell us your problem
OK, I've got a bit of a problem here. I‘m seeing someone who I really like but he's not not into kink. How can I tell him about my kink side? It‘s a tough one because he‘s already taken the piss out of BDSM and says he thinks it's "Weird".
Test the water to sense his reaction to it—bring up light subjects such as bondage. Even people who tend to lean on the vanilla side like to be tied up now and again so you might find yourself surprised and he might not be as innocent as you think. Kink is quite a strong word anyway. When some people think of kink they probably think of someone being tied up and beaten with various pieces of equipment. If you‘re already having sex then maybe rather than a discussion, bring something into the bedroom such as a pair of handcuffs. You could use them on him, or even him on you depending on your preferences. There‘s very few guys we've met that don‘t like to experiment. It‘s just a case of taking it slow and being patient.
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* Well, when we say 'surgery', we don't mean 'surgery' in the conventional sense, but, rather, a bunch of guys hanging around in a bedroom and y'know, trying to figure out your problems. In other words, while we try to get the best advice for you, nothing here should be construed as qualified professional opinion.